5 Steps to Failing Your First Semester
1) Choose a major you have never done well in during High School.
I am an art kid, I wear wayfarers, horizontal stripes and my clothes reek of turpentine. Out of the 29 schools I applied to, I got into 3 art schools and 1 non-art school. Logically I choose the non-art school and a science major. Fail.
2) Take just enough credits to stay a full time student.
I am taking General Chemistry, Poetry, and Biology 1. If I drop any of the classes I am failing (3/3) I would be kicked out of my housing. Basically trapping myself in a fail sandwich.
3) Take 8am labs.
Stumbling into a lecture still drunk and with the taste of last night's mistake in your mouth is bad, imagine drunkenly playing with 2M Nitric Acid. Fail.
4)Have An Awesome Roommate
Gabby is the best roommate ever. We watch the Mighty Boosh, smoke in our dorms, and walk around the City. We also, skip class together, never clean our room, and decided that homework is just a suggestion. Fail.
5) The Interwebs
Facebook. Blogs. Twitter. Fail.
